Jacksonville at Atlanta (12.5)
The Falcons looked poised to return to the playoffs yet again with Matt Ryan running the show. The Jaguars looked poised for a move to Los Angeles because there is no such thing as a Jacksonville fan to watch the show, however pathetic, being put on by Blaine Gabbert.
Pick: Falcons.
Dallas at Tampa Bay (+9)
The Cowboys players were excited for their trip to Tampa Bay, because they want to remain as warm as possible on their way down the chute in yet another December collapse. The funny thing is, with the holidays America’s team collapses, but America’s economy gets a boost.
Pick: Bucs.
Miami at Buffalo (Pick)
Surprising that after Monday Night Football featured Seattle and St. Louis last week that they didn’t pick up another game between division rivals that is completely unimportant and bound to be more boring than winter in upstate New York.
Pick: Bills (to win)
Seattle at Chicago (-3.5)
It was the hand of God that forced Marion Barber out-of-bounds and caused him to fumble the ball last week against the Broncos, right? Wrong, it was the fact that he played for the Dallas Cowboys and caught the disease known as “Tonius Decemberomo” or for short, “Tony Romo’s Disease.”
Pick: Bears.
Tennessee at Indianapolis (+6.5)
Chris Johnson has looked like an all-pro yet again the last few weeks. The closest thing that the Colts have to an all-pro is Jim Irsay’s Twitter game.
Pick: Colts.
Green Bay at Kansas City (+11)
The biggest blow that Green Bay has suffered all year was Greg Jennings spraining his knee last week. The biggest blow that the Chiefs suffered was starting the year with the roster that they had.
Pick: Packers.
Cincinnati at St. Louis (+7)
Andy Dalton and the Bengals at one point found themselves holding the top seed in the AFC, but now they need to stop a slide and push their way into the playoffs. Luckily for them, they play the Rams who are essentially an emergency brake in the cars of all other NFL teams.
Pick: Bengals.
New Orleans at Minnesota (+7.5)
The Saints are arguably the biggest threat to beating the Packers. The Vikings, meanwhile, are the biggest threat to beating the Jaguars to Los Angeles. The Vikings could join the Lakers as professional teams to flee Minnesota for the glamour of LA, they might also finally win some titles if they make that move like the Lakers have.
Pick: Saints.
Washington at New York (N) (-6.5)
Remember when the Redskins opened the year with a victory over the G-Men and we thought that the race was on in the NFC East? Too bad Rex Grossman is like a time bomb and when he goes off he explodes crap in all directions.
Pick: Giants.
Carolina at Houston (-6)
The Texans have already clinched the first division title in the franchise’s history, and did so in spite of injuries. The Panthers have remained in obscurity and have done so in spite of being able to legally pay Cam Newton and his teammates.
Pick: Panthers.
Detroit at Oakland (+3)
Both of these teams are trying to fight their way out of recent struggles and make their mark on playoff football. No one has been talking about this game, however, because the last time that a game between these two has had playoff implications was before Al Davis knew what football was.
Pick: Lions.
New England at Denver (+7.5)
Huh, didn’t know this game was being played this week. No one is talking about it at all. Has anyone else seen the ads for the Christian dating website? I think that they should have Tim Tebow do an ad during the game saying, “Are you sick of pretty boys, and guys with babies out of wedlock? Stop thinking about looks first and think about God’s role in your relationships.” They should also make sure their ad comes immediately after Tom Brady’s Ugg boot commercial.
Pick: Patriots.
New York (A) at Philadelphia (-3)
Teams that have Philadelphia on the schedule still are now being said to have “tough” schedules. What will it take for people to give up on the hype and “potential” that this Eagles’ team has? This team is terrible. The players haven’t come together, the coaching staff is a joke, and people would rather watch a crappier version of Mike Vick play in Denver.
Pick: Jets (and to win).
Cleveland at Arizona (-6.5)
Colt McCoy was in the news because the hit that he suffered at the hands of James Harrison earned Harrison a suspension and so it was played over and over and over again. Good thing McCoy will have no recollection of seeing it at all because of the concussion that he wasn’t tested for. Good job cracking down on those NFL.
Pick: Cardinals.
Baltimore at San Diego (+2.5)
The Chargers are sliding hard at the end of the year and it looks like they will fall short of the playoffs because of Tim Tebow’s comebacks. Norv Turner won’t end up being fired because of his own stupidity, but rather someone else’s genius. Funny how that goes.
Pick: Ravens.
Pittsburgh at San Francisco (-3)
Well this is weird, a good game between two classic, storied franchises featured on Monday night. I have become so accustomed to not even thinking of watching football on Monday that I now have to reconsider my whole life it feels like.
Pick: Steelers (and to win).
thebullpenblogger 